May
17
Counselling for couples engaged or otherwise considering marriage is something that has largely been encouraged by religious organisations that perform weddings, but hopefully this will change so that pre-marriage counselling becomes common for all couples – whether they are religious and having a religious wedding ceremony, or not.
Why is pre-marital counselling a good idea? Marriage is difficult in the modern world, with so much stress put on new families, including the reality that most modern couples have to both work, just to survive financially. Add to financial responsibilities the stresses of child-rearing, dealing with extended families, global economic volatility (which can affect job stability, among other things) and a host of other factors close to home and the stress put upon new and growing families is very intense. To see the effects of these factors on the modern family, we only have to see the divorce statistics for countries in the Western world.
Pre-marriage counselling gives couples a chance to consider whether their long-term goals dreams and visions are compatible. Couples are able to begin their marriage understanding the desires and needs of their partners, because they have openly discussed these things beforehand. Does your partner want kids? Does he or she want a similar lifestyle to what you want? How does your partner deal with grief, loss, anxiety and other issues that could put a strain on your marriage? What does your partner believe the role of extended family should be for you two? Many people enter marriage believing that they know the answers to these questions and many more, but find that they are sadly mistaken once they are married and have committed their well-being (and possibly the well-being of their children) to another.
All couples should consider pre-marital counselling before making one of the biggest decisions of their lives.